#DadChat recently discussed the mistakes we all make in Social Media with expert John Paul Aguiar. Using the transcript as a guide, I wanted to share the best tips and advice we learned from this topic at #DadChat.
Firstly, some overall impressions I took away from the discussion. Social Media is dangerous, to a degree, for all of us. The ability to hit “Send” can be done in a fit of creativity OR a fit or anger. The latter will usually come back to haunt us. The ability to reach out via a tweet requires little forethought and, again, can be harmful if we are reacting in the moment.
I’ve often said to my boys and to myself that whenever I’m upset and have an immediate desire to lash out or do something in response to being emotional, that is exactly when I should sit on it – at the least, overnight. This was emphasized and then some by everyone in this discussion.
It was also clear in this discussion that the Social Media mistakes we can make have no boundary of gender or age. Everyone is quite capable of putting their foot in their mouth. Heck, I do it regularly in real life – just ask my wife!
Herewith are some of the takeaways from last night (in the order they occurred, but only a fraction of the 1,600+ tweets). The #DadChat community has so many wise and smart peeps so if you are not mentioned, forgive me, but I love you ALL! If you want to read the entire transcript, be my guest!
@sharongreenthal – The biggest mistake we make in social media is thinking we can keep things private.
@JohnAguiar -2the biggest reason you should be careful of what you share on social media? It will come up any time someone does a G search.
@BruceSallan – @JohnAguiar – What are the biggest pitfalls our kids need to know?
@JohnAguiar – the biggest pitfalls our kids need to know are that social media is not private.. you never know who is watching and taking notes.
@Dr_Weberman – Yes, and 4ever is a tough concept 4 teens RT @JohnAguiar: Once it’s Indexed, it’s there forever for anyone to see.
@JohnAguiar – RT @Dr_Weberman: Yes, and 4ever is a tough concept 4 teens.
@aDadsPov – @JohnAguiar – is ANYTHING private anymore?
@JohnAguiar -Privacy online and on SM sites is a joke. Soooo you need to watch what you share ALWAYS.
@johnaguiar – There is no privacy anymore, hasn’t been for a long time. You control what you put online, that’s the privacy you have.
@SusanGiurleo – Monitor as a matter of course. Have all passwords, do spot checks, esp when kids are just starting out online.
@JohnAguiar – Monitoring your kids is a fine line… its a give and take, trust them, but check in once in awhile.
RT @BruceSallan: NOTHING when they are mad! RT @socksinthedisco: thoughts about what to tell kids not to post?
@alexbfinlayson -Don’t drink and text (sound advice to all).
@JohnAguiar – if it’s illegal in real life, then it’s illegal online, so watch what you say and do.
@JohnAguiar – I think 18 is a good back off stage. If they don’t know better by then, then it’s on them.
@sharongreenthal – I have to laugh as well. If you want privacy, do not create an account online. Keep a diary instead.
@BruceSallan: – if it weren’t for texting, I’d never hear from my boys!
@Converoo – Most of the middle school kids are spending time Vid Chatting – its huge here.
@gingerconsult wonder what all of those cute little kids will think when they grow up and see what mommy wrote about them.
@JohnAguiar – Middle schoolers are hard, I know, I used to be a bus driver lol.
@Nick_Kelly – one lesson is that the internet is like a city. There are places you can go alone and others you wouldn’t visit w/o parents.
LOVE THE ABOVE TWEET!
@gingerconsult – The lesson for kids and adults is self discipline. Social platforms are not a place to come to vent your emotions.
@AngelaMaiers -The BIGGEST SoMe concern is students not being taught how2 use SoMe to fullest; its banned, blocked, misrepresented at mass scale.
@AngelaMaiers – We are all learning the new rules of the literacy club!
@AngelaMaiers – S’ digital history is becoming mor critical to their future than their oral history! We MUST teach then to leave their mark!
@JohnAguiar – yep, full name for us adults is fine, but never for kids.
@JohnAguiar – Yes a tweet will be deleted, but it will sit on people streams and search for a little while before it is fully deleted.
@gingerconsult @johnaguiar – And you never know who has grabbed a screen capture of the tweets, nothing is gone forever online.
@JohnAguiar – Teens need to care what they share, because we know employers are monitoring and I’m pretty sure colleges will too.
@patricksplace – The closer kids get to working age, the more critical it is that they tweet responsibly. Could cost them a job!
@BruceSallan – I really HATE it when I’ve inadvertently offended someone…seriously…that is why it’s wise to THINK before you SEND!
@AngelaMaiers – Even more-parents need 2B the MODEL of how the web can be used and who u can be b/c of it.
@manifest_1 – RT @BruceSallan: OUR job is to be our kid’s BEST PARENT – not their Best Friend! Don’t forget that – EVER!
@wonderoftech – A college student was advised to get a Facebook account because employers suspect you’re hiding something if you don’t have 1.
@JohnAguiar – All kids will mature are their own speed, YOU as the parent should know what your kid can and can’t handle.
@JohnAguiar – If you don’t know them or don’t know someone that knows them then DON’T friend them.
@AngelaMaiers – Challenge w/ANY adult being model 4 kids-is that adult must emulate the behaviors u wish 2 see. Most adults r dig. illiterate.
@BarryBirkett – Fantastic- so many don’t RT @brucesallan My son matured more in the last year – his first at college – than the previous 18 combined!
@Milaspage – +100 “@gingerconsult: @angelamaiers The web is a tool, it doesn’t form our kids. Parents need to teach how to use it appropriately.
@AngelaMaiers – If we teach kids2 only “friend” people they know,2B terrified of strangers-we dont teach critical skills of #networkliteracy
WISDOM in the above tweet!
@ThisLilParent – We become #moms thru change in #hormones but #dads have to learn it on their own.
@JoelleParra – @JohnAguiar definitely! Think of all the dumb things kids say and do at that age?! Add a camera & online audience = trouble!
@BruceSallan – @ThisLilParent – Wow – so you agree with me that men and women are actually different! lol.
@JohnAguiar – @Nick_Kelly education is where it’s at.. some truth, some fear and some consequences should work nicely :).
The #DadChat community is 24/7 and is comprised of dads and moms. We get together every Thursday evening from 6:00 – 7:00 p.m. PT/9:00 – 10:00 p.m. ET but feel free to check out the #DadChat hashtag ANY time.
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