Are Your Feelings Your Moral Guide? #DadChat

Category: Moral Question of the Week, Weekly Columns

We live in a world that seems to be governed by “feelings.” The classic therapy question is, “How do you feel (about that)?” Well, SHOULD our feelings be our guide in life and decisions? THAT is this week’s Moral Question of the Week. Add your thoughts in the comment section, below…

  • Stan Faryna

    The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?

    – Jeremiah 17:9

    • Bruce Sallan

      I’m grateful I can’t understand it @faryna:disqus

  • Sharon Ulery Ruggieri

    UGH, what a question. Sometimes we need to trust our “feelings.” Like if you think that creepy guy on the elevator is…well, creepy, he probably is. However, feelings aren’t logical and can’t always be trusted. Like with voting. Good Lord, if only more people used their brains instead of their feelings when they cast their vote, this country may still be the best place to live.

    Now I’m “feeling” a headache coming on… 😉

    • Bruce Sallan

      @sharonuleryruggieri:disqus – I sincerely hope you “feel” better, Sharon!

  • Tom Eakin

    Feelings cannot be our moral guides. We all want to be happy. In order to do that, we must do things that will make us satisfied with ourselves. We first need to know what our values are so we can discern which actions will align with them. When we do things just because we believe they will make us happy it is too easy to be confused about what to do. When we sacrifice our morals, our values, for a feeling, we can never be satisfied with ourselves, and therefore we cannot truly be happy. When we do things that reflect our values, we can be satisfied with our efforts and provide ourselves with the opportunity to be happy.

    • Bruce Sallan

      Well put @tomeakin:disqus – most people don’t realize that most “fun” things don’t make us happy but the things that are often the toughest do – like parenting or getting a degree or getting a difficult job well (done)!

  • Nisha Varghese

    i don’t think your feelings should be your guide i believe everybody should have moral code that they live by.

    • Bruce Sallan

      You could NEVER be part of the Democratic (political) Party here @nisha_varghese:disqus because you have common sense! Lol…(sad, but true!)

      • Nisha Varghese


  • David Weber

    Should feelings be our guide in life? If I had any idea what the phrase here, I could probably manufacture an answer to that question. But since I don’t, I had better not try.

    Should feelings be our guide in decisions (I presume this means in the process of making decisions)? I imagine that depends a great deal on what the decision concerns. For example, if it is a major life decision that affects a number of people, such as members of one’s immediate family, feelings of whatever type may be something to take into account, but probably ought not to be the only phenomena or issues to consider or notice.

    Something I have read in recent articles originating in the world of cognitive science is that feelings and rationality cannot be kept separate in human decision-making. That is, at a certain ultimate point, all decisions must pass a feeling-based sense of what is fulfilling or satisfying. If the option generated by and through ratiocination does not “feel right,” it will not be selected … OR something like “buyer’s remorse” sets in.

    • Bruce Sallan

      @disqus_dU5ulU60s7:disqus – I was intentionally vague so the reader could choose to respond in whatever way they “felt.” For me, I was really thinking more about how without religion in our lives then everything is really only about “feelings” since there’s no other governance that really would count…