The Family Dinner

A Dad’s Point-of-View, by Bruce Sallan

The Family Dinner

I had a discussion with some other dads the other day about “the family dinner.”  To my surprise, many of these men described their family eating adventures as just that, an adventure.  Or, more specifically: a circus, trial, ordeal, and other pejoratives.

My immediate thought was about the classic image of Norman Rockwell’s painting, “Freedom From Want” with the image of “mom” or “grandma” presenting the turkey at what is likely a Thanksgiving dinner, with the whole family eager, excited, and present.  “Dad” or “grandpa” is looking on, with the expectation that he will carve the bird.  How quaint; how lovely; how sadly antiquated, I fear.
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Would You Trade Your Life (With Someone Else)?

Haven’t we all at one time or another said something like, “Boy, I’d sure like to trade my life for his or hers!”  Sometimes it’s about someone we know personally but often it’s about a “famous” person who we think we know.  My assertion is that when you really think about it,you wouldn’t trade your life with anyone!

There’s a caveat to this assertion, naturally, which is simply health-related and extreme poverty related.  If someone were seriously sick, especially with a debilitating illness, changing lives would be nice.  If someone were starving to death in a corrupt nation, yes changing lives would also be a good thing.  But, for the average American or citizen of a free country without extreme poverty or corruption, this idea about not switching lives may apply and at least provoke some reflection.
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There Are No Perfect Friends

I remember that one of my mother’s many sayings, when I was growing up, related to friends and went something like, “If you want perfect friends, you won’t have any.”  This was often in response to my irritation at what a particular friend had done.  Later, more often than not, if my mom asked me if that particular thing my friend had done was resolved, I’d have forgotten what it was altogether.

As with so many things our parents say to us, their advice often goes unheeded but comes back later in life to haunt us because of their truth. We could have saved ourselves much pain and embarrassment had we paid heed originally.  My mom is probably laughing, somewhere high above, since her death two years ago, at the “fun” I’m living with thanks to my two teenagers.  As she may have said, “What goes around comes around.”
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A Jew In Church

My wife is Christian; I’m Jewish. Since we were not going to have children together, this wasn’t much of an issue since this was a second marriage for both of us.  We did have the Christmas tree problem but resolved that amicably, by at first going to her parent’s house to celebrate Christmas with them.  When my wife got sick and we couldn’t make it that year, I relented and we brought the Christmas tree into our home.

Now we’re celebrating both Christmas and Hannukah in our home and, more recently, I’ve even attended her church (Calvary Community Church in Westlake Village, California). Imagine that, a Jew in church.

This issue, of religion in the home is a touchy one for most couples getting married, especially as they plan on having and raising children. It’s not a simple question nor is there a simple answer.  I believe it’s extremely important for a couple to discuss this, in depth, before they marry or have children if they believe and practice different faiths. read more

Radio Show – Life–Wait a Minute and It Will Change!

First air date: Thursday, August 5, 2010

Featured guests:

Bill McLeod (singleparentstown.com) discussing his new book, “99 Tips That Every Single Parent Must Have”

Wayne Levine (BetterMen.Org) for “The Men’s Room”

Bruce Sallan rambling and doing “Teen Rap”

Julie Spira (Cyber Dating Expert) for “Single Parenting Dating”

The column referenced is,“Life–Wait a Minute and It Will Change.”
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