When You’re On Vacation, Your Kids Still Need You

I learned something very simple, very basic, and very important about parenting while on vacation, overseas, these past three weeks.  I was being selfish.  I have two teenagers who needed their dad, and this three-week trip was an indulgence that wasn’t necessary, was too long, and resulted in my not being there for my older son when he needed me.

As luck would have it, I got sick and we returned a few days early, right as his crisis was in full bloom.  Only due to this odd, lucky timing was I able to get down and talk with him, and address his anger and issues. I could support him as he continues to struggle through his teenage hormonal and otherwise raging insanity.  In other words–normal teen growth and development.

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Who Cares About a Clean House? My Wife Does!

clean houseSo, what do my wife and I fight about? The big things like sex, money, and the kids?  Nah, that would be too easy, too typical.  We fight about a clean house including the dog-hair, where the dishes go, the vacuuming, wiping off the counters, folding the laundry, and the kid’s messy rooms.  Oh, and making the bed with ALL those pillows!

I was a 24/7 single dad to my two boys and two dogs for several years.  During those years, I lapsed in the area of clean house.  There were more pressing things to deal with, in my opinion.  Dating again, for one thing.  And, more seriously, the emotional fall-out to my boys because of their (biological) mom abandoning them. read more

Just A Guy Scared About His Son Having Sex

My 16-year-old son has a girlfriend, going on six months now and going strong. She’s terrific and so is her family.  They seem locked at the hip and they’ve even managed to avoid the common mistake of “first love” by maintaining their existing friends and not drooling over each other ad nauseum.

However, they are holding hands all the time and even when I knock on my son’s door before entering, they’re often on his bed together, clearly enjoying each other’s company.

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This Guy Talks Too Much!

I have a big mouth and I’ve even been described as a guy who talks too much.  Anyone that knows me knows I’m highly opinionated and my family, in particular, lives with me both repeating myself and just droning on endlessly. It’s as if I don’t get an “Okay” or “Yeah, Dad” I assume my boys haven’t heard me.

Recently, I’ve begun a very stupid habit of complaining or voicing out loud issues between my wife and I, venting and expecting a sympathetic ear, to one or the other of my boys.  I’m not voicing anything of a deeply personal nature but it is still inappropriate discussion for them to hear from their dad, about their stepmother. Like I said, this guy talks too much. read more

Just A Guy Having a Corny Moment With His Son

As my kids get older, each touching corny moment (and I mean “touching” literally, as well as figuratively) becomes more and more fleeting.  As I have two boys, the amount of kissing and hugging is reduced to the point of pretty much shaking hands, and with my younger son (13), an occasional hug and air peck on the cheek.  At least my (3) dogs still give me affection (and, my wife, of course – if I didn’t say that I’d be in the “dog-house”).

BUT, I had one of those “at this age” unusual and rare sappy parenting moments with my young teen when he and I went to see AVATAR. It was Saturday night so we thought getting there an hour early would be time enough to get tickets for the 7:00 p.m. show.  Nope, sold out. So, we got them for the 8:00 p.m. show and went for dinner.

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Do We Teach Our Kids How to Make Good Decisions?

One of the many things that we try to teach our children is how to make good decisions.  Sometimes the problem can be that we may not always make good decisions ourselves or we may allow emotions to influence our choices.  I found this to be true in a recent argument I had with my older son and a latter discussion about an important choice he wanted to make.

The argument was about his last-minute decision to back out of his promise to come skiing with me over Winter Break, preferring instead to stay home with his friends (and girlfriend). I got angry as he made this decision days before we were supposed to leave, thus leaving me high and dry with little time to find a friend to come in his place.  My wife and other son were already scheduled to go on a very special trip to Japan and Hong Kong.

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