Just A Guy With A Mature Teen (Imagine That?)

I had a fight with my mature teen.  I acted like a teen and he acted like an adult.  I pouted.  He was reasonable.  I was yelling.  He was calm.  I hate when that happens!

It all had to do with expectations and desires, on my part, for my mature teen son to want to hang out with his dad.  Our family was apart this holiday season as my wife and younger son went to Japan and Hong Kong.

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When Did I Become the Senior Dad?

While walking with a friend the day after Thanksgiving, we shared our respective holiday experiences and noted that we were both now the senior dads–the main paternal figure in our respective families. We laughed together, but it was a moment of melancholy and reflection, both of which were feelings I had this Thanksgiving.

My father died four years ago and my mother died just a year ago, so this was our first Thanksgiving in which neither of my parents was with us. Yes, the aging of my parents effectively made me the “man in charge” for many of their later years, but I still viewed them as the senior generation and offered them the respect and deference that they continued to deserve during those difficult years. But now, other than an older 3rd cousin that I adore, it’s now me representing that older figure in our small family. read more

Random Musings

Author’s Note: Let me know if you like this kind of column, for a change.

Sometimes there are many ideas fighting for attention in my mind, covering all the subjects I tend to write a column about, but each isn’t worthy of its own full-length coverage. Consequently, I collect them.  So, in no particular order, here are my current random musings. read more

Review of “The Boys Are Back”

The Boys Are Back is a small independent film, shot and set entirely in South Australia, directed by Scott Hicks (who did “Shine”) and starring Clive Owen and all unknowns, including two child actors who were pivotal in the “inspired by a true story” film.

My wife and I went to a preview and had a spirited discussion about it over dinner later.  It didn’t help that there was a Q&A afterward with the director and Clive Owen in which my wife was practically drooling.  Okay, he is one handsome dude.  Plus, he was articulate and gracious.  In other words, completely hate-able. read more

Short Review of “Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs”

cloudy with a chance of meatballsMuch to my surprise and pleasure, I totally loved Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs when I saw it yesterday with my “little brother” (I’m a Big Brother and he is 7).  We saw it in 3D and while those effects were good, it wasn’t a movie that screamed a need for 3D.  It was that rare animated movie that was truly clever, without trying too hard.  I was totally amused, laughing, and appreciative of the extraordinary quality of its graphics and very clever script. read more

Just A Guy Feeling Left Out

My son is almost 16 and he now has a girlfriend.  Evidently it’s “official” as both have declared they’re “in a relationship” on their Facebook pages.  Everyone in my family, my wife and younger son, says it’s none of my business.  I can’t help it; I’m feeling left out and curious.  Is this so wrong?  I also want to be sure he’s handling “things” appropriately.

He has gone from being the quintessential guy’s guy, only hanging out with his male buddies, to having a posse of female friends, one “special” one now, and his male friends seem to have bit the dust, except for his band-mates. read more

Just A Guy Wishing His Kids Said “Yes” Once In a While

What happened to kids listening to their parents?  It seems whatever I ask my boys to do, the response is always some sort of “No,” whether it be questioning why I won’t do it myself or saying “later.”  Am I missing something or have I just become a total wimp of a dad?

When did it become okay to disobey our parents with relative impunity?  I guess when us boomers became parents and began spoiling our kids by giving them everything they wanted. read more

Summertime and the Livin’ is Easy

I love that song.  Who can’t help but love it?  It’s nearing summertime by this dad’s astute intuition and the school calendar, and that tells me it’s summer once again and what are we going to do with the kids?  A stay-at-home parent’s life is dictated by driving.  Driving his or her kids to and from school, to their various extra-curricular activities, to doctor’s appointments, etc.  We live in the car, so summer is actually my break, too.

However, each summer poses a challenge of what to provide to best occupy my boys and possibly add positively to their life experiences.  I’ve given up on any sports-oriented activities as they’ve rejected all of them.  I signed up to coach a baseball team when Will, my older son, expressed interest in playing ball at around age eight.  It ended with me continuing to finish the season as coach while he quit halfway through.  Now, we all know that my allowing him to quit was a failure of mine as a parent, but we also know that parenting is an ongoing learning experience and one we might succeed at, finally, with our grandkids.  And, that’s only because we can send them home after a while. read more