I remember when my dad had the sex talk with me. It was at a BBQ joint with sawdust on the floor. He talked mostly in euphemisms and I didn’t really understand much at all. Not a great beginning as I fumbled along for years to come.
However, I was determined to handle things differently with my boys and, as luck and coincidence had it, I ended up having the sex talk with each boy in the past few months. I sort of had it with my older one before, but he’d gotten a girlfriend and I had to be sure he understood the rules, obligations, and risks. So, we had a second talk, so I could be confident he knew the basics.
With my youngest, it occurred spontaneously the other evening at a crowded Japanese restaurant. It was amazing how little he understood or knew from school. For instance, he thought a woman could get pregnant any time of the month.
“I HATE it,” or “I HATE my teacher,” or “I HATE that restaurant.” Sound familiar. When my younger son uses that word or is complaining or whining as much as he and his older brother do, I find myself going nuts on them. “You HATE” such and such? There are things to hate in this world, like terrorists, rapists, serial murderers, taxes, Britney Spears and Renee Zellweger, but an item of food, a less than terrific teacher?
This falls under the category of spoiled rotten. I must’ve done something to encourage this behavior and my new wife always gives me “the look” when they act that way; the look that says, “well, where do you think they got it from?” I then give her the look that says, “bug off,” and we go on to a fight from there. Okay, just kidding. Sort of.
I doubt there’s any way I can win writing about this menopause topic any more than commenting on PMS at all wins over women’s hearts. But, that said, I have to say women’s plumbing and emotions continue to be a mystery to me.
My new wife has been “in menopause” since we met, so I actually have no idea who she really is. First, there were the hot flashes. Then, the moods. Then, more moods. Then, the new moods began, followed by the post hot flashes moods. Did I mention her moods? When does menopause end??
What an interesting contemporary question: will the kids ever leave? I left home at sixteen to go away to college and never returned, except for visits. I stayed close to my parents, and they did help me financially through college, though I worked every summer to supplement my education expenses and pay for my own spending. ShortRib (my wife) and I wonder when will our kids be independent enough to afford to leave?
The other day I talked with a mother who has two teenage daughters. One is graduating from high school this year while the other has two more years to go. I asked what were their plans, and had she discussed it with her husband, and I was surprised to hear she had no clue. Neither she, her husband, or the kids really knew where the girls were heading, especially when it came to the idea of supporting themselves with a real job, after college.