Just A Guy and His Overwhelmed Wife

Posted on December 10, 2009 by Bruce Sallan

I have an overwhelmed wife. And, I suspect I’m the first guy who has heard from his overwhelmed wife how busy she is, how much she does, how tired she is, how under-appreciated she is, and how I do nothing. Well, it’s true. I actually do nothing.

I don’t take care of the boys, pay for our lives, walk our three dogs, pay the bills, clean up after myself and others in the kitchen, occasionally cook, often BBQ, do the CostCo runs, put gas in my wife’s car, tell her how much I love her, and how amazing her cooking is. Nah, I do none of that stuff.

Just A Guy Farting: Part Two

Posted on October 17, 2009 by Bruce Sallan

I hope you all read my first blog on guy farting and especially watched the attached video. We’ve attached it again, along with another favorite of the “genre.” What is it about farting that is so funny?

So, my wife still does NOT think it’s funny, though occasionally she will snicker in spite of herself. She’s seen the video of the couple in bed and the other morning, I swear, we ended up mimicking them almost word for word!

It was that just before dawn time when you’re only half-awake. Our three dogs were lying on their beds, in our room, peacefully sleeping. One of them, our oldest, actually snores slightly. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, while in my sleep, I farted. Woke both my wife and myself up.

Don’t Take It Personally

Posted on May 19, 2009 by Bruce Sallan

I know my column is from my personal perspective, and often about my personal life. Yet I feel this topic is more confessional than many others and affects me too often. I take things too personally. Having this deficiency is truly toxic when you are raising kids or beginning a new marriage, both of which define my present state of affairs.

Let’s give some examples and see how many of you relate to them. Easy ones are when ShortRib (my wife) isn’t smiling, isn’t talking much, or doesn’t respond quickly to an e-mail, or text of mine. I always assume that it’s my fault or something I’ve done.

Just A Guy Whose Kids Say They’re Bored

Posted on May 3, 2009 by Bruce Sallan

I’m amazed when my boys tell me they’re bored. Bored? With all the options they have today? The best response I ever heard to a kid saying “I’m bored” was “No, you’re boring.” A brilliant response from a parent and I wish I’d said it first. It is not our job to be our kid’s entertainment coordinator.

When I was a kid, we played. Seems kind of quaint. We made up games. One of my favorites was called Mongoose, where we took two books and hit a ping-pong ball back and forth between them with the object to see how long we could keep it going. Then, they’re all the adventures we’d go on in our own Huck Finn way. Places to explore, bikes to ride, trees to climb.